I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
