Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
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