I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
