So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
it's great music for shaving your balls
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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