69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
