I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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