I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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