I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
