wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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