Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
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