I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Plan B is the new Plan A
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
