I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
