Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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