I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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