okay pat passed out under dana's car
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
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My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
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We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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