and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize
