we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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