What a fucking waste of an outfit
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
