How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Blood and glitter go together right?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
