i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
A+ Viking dick
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
