just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
