Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
