She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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