I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
