He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
