drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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