i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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