So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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