Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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