R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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