Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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