i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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