Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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