i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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