Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?

(760): View more from California

oh geez, wrong person.

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(847): View more from Illinois

i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.

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(773): View more from Illinois

She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(646): View more from New York

last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good

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(847): View more from Illinois

And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.

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(425): View more from Washington

You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.

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(571): View more from Virginia

I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it

(812): View more from Indiana

You had 10 drinks. On a first date.

(571): View more from Virginia

I just masterbated then started bawling.

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(410): View more from Maryland

How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?

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