I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
