I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize
