Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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