i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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