i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize