i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Randomize
