ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
