he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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