A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
