I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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