Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
