One girl and one boy is just not enough.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
