Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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