MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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