i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You've changed since you got that strap on
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
