He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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